Social Media Meltdown

Posted on 12th November 2015

I love social media.

No, I hate it.

No, I love it.

No, I hate it.

Shit, I’m kind of addicted.

I get up in the morning, sleepily walk to the bathroom and fall onto the toilet with phone in hand. I check my email, then my Twitter, sometimes followed by Facebook. It’s like their are two Cracks in action. One is a drug, making me feel I need to catch up with the world, the other is spouting out unnecessary waste content. To be honest… I’m not sure which is which.

I remember working at the design agency, when web 2.0 was born – yes that is a real saying (it came from America if you couldn’t guess). The birth of the read/write web. We would all now have a voice with Blogs, Facebook, and a bunch of other social media platforms that were going to transform the world.

It would give us all a voice. And it did….. All…. Of….. Us…..

And now, we have a world filled with sound-byted opinions of nothingness.


Yes, people want their opinion heard (I do understand the irony of this post by the way).

Important political, economical and social arguments get tied up nicely into 140 character opinions, obviously ensuring we leave room for a #stupidfuckinghashtag.

Context gets lost as people (usually from the western world)  try to undermine and verbally attack societies that aren’t like theirs. People sit in their nice warm Starbucks, reading their Guardian or Daily Mail, drinking their overpriced consumer drug of choice, opining on social media about what’s wrong in China or the Middle East.

Yes people – the Israelis and Palestinians have got it all wrong. Draft in Margo from Cheam and Roger from Cirencester – they’ll sort this shit out in the time it takes you to post a photo to Instagram.

Fickle Trickle

We’re all spouting shit. We write what we need to get attention and then forget about it – usually because most people don’t take any notice. All with a level of contradiction that would make UKIP seem like a logical solution to the problem of migration.

Here’s a current example that makes me somewhat perplexed:

John Lewis have just released their annual Christmas Advert. Some people scoffed at it, some people said it made them cry. It’s a TV advert that is quite possibly one of the most anticipated media releases of the year.

Apparently, it is also designed to highlight old people and loneliness at Christmas.

Within days, an image starts doing the rounds that says, “They spent £7m on this, we’d wish they spent the money on the old people instead”.

It’s a fucking TV advert! It’s designed to sell shit!

The same people sharing it are probably moaning while sipping their free laté from their local Waitrose using a social media site that pays zero corporation tax in the UK, on their Smartphone that was built in China by someone on £2 a day.

“Yah Jeremy, those bastards at Waitrose make me sick. Pass me another Pan Au Chocolat.”

Inane in The Membrane

Let’s face it, life is 80% boring drudgery for the proletariat. It’s about cleaning, washing, shopping, working, tidying up after the kids.

Every so often, you fill it with something fun. Although now, you also have to tell everyone about it at the same time. “Hey look at me, isn’t my life shit hot? Soooo much better than yours you fucking loser!”

Fuelled by the world of Reality TV and magazines, far too many people are trying to keep up with the Kardashians.

If it’s not that, we get the “look at me posts” about how cruel some people are.

And still, we don’t really take notice.

Why, because we don’t reaaaaally give a shit.

And people still post.

They share pictures asking you to share a post to show you care.

Or like a photo because it has a picture of a kitten on it.

Or bet you they don’t get a million likes for their cancer suffering child.


Sometimes I wish I lived in a simpler world. Perhaps a village in Africa where the only real problem you have is trying to stave off disease while finding some food to eat, not worrying that your phone battery is going to die… Oh FML.

Crag (that’s my African accent)… I hafent got time to listen about how depressed you are…We need to find food, I’m fookin starfing my frend. Now put that phone down, I’f told you I don’t want a selfie.

I also worry about my ability to pay attention. I can’t seem to watch TV without picking up my phone every half hour.

As for the huge corporations are doing with the data we’re all feeding them! I am not fooled that their profits come first and their is a huge innovation race going on in our lifetime which will eventually cause a stranglehold on humanity.

I’d like to say I’ll crack my own habit; that from now on I will tune out, turn off, and drop out; but I’m not so sure. I love some of the banter… the funny posts. I do like seeing photos of some people doing normal things in life. I love the ability to stay in touch without putting in too much effort and perhaps that’s the crux of the problem.

Technology is fundamentally a very very clever thing… Unfortunately, the people using it… are still people.

2 Replies to "Social Media Meltdown"

  • Bob Lethaby
    13th November 2015 (12:22 am)

    Interesting post Craig..I had considered pulling the plug on FB for some time as I use it too much and not many people like my posts, so it seem a bit of a waste of time. However, it is important for my blog readership so it is a bit catch 22.

    There was a guy on Newsnight last night and he was saying the key to FB is to not get carried away with how great you are as it is perhaps a sign of unhappiness if you do so; however, people love to gloat, particularly in an age of overt narcissism.

    The strange thing is that I like FB posts that are really nauseating, I think it is a kind of social media perversion.

    🙂 “Feeling blessed…flowers on the table when I got home..gotta love my man”

    I want to write “He’s having an affair” but I generally hold off and keep it to a fantasy. However, when a girl from school who was tiny (about 4′ 10″) contacted me and said “Guess what I am doing now?” I sensed a incoming brag so I replied “Garden gnome?”

    She logged off.

  • Craig Killick
    13th November 2015 (5:28 am)

    Ha ha… it’s only posts like your one about burnt testicles that keep me hanging on Bob.

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